Jokes

सपने को हकीकत में बदलते हैं
संता को सपने में लड़की ने चप्पल से मारा.
अगले 2 दिनों तक संता अपने बैंक नहीं गया, क्योंकि वहाँ लिखा था -
“हम आपके सपने को हकीकत में बदलते हैं.

जुड़वां 
जुड़वां बच्चे अपने कमरे में बैठे थे.
एक हंस-हंस के लोटपोट हो रहा था जबकि दूसरा उदास था.
बाप - इतना क्यों हंस रहे हो ?
बच्चा - मम्मी ने दोनों बार इसी को नहला दिया … !

अब संभव नहीं है 
पिता - एक ज़माना था जब मैं सिर्फ 10 रुपए में ही किराना, दूध, सब्जी और नाश्ता लेकर आता था.
पुत्र - अब संभव नहीं है पिताजी क्योंकि अब वहाँ सीसीटीवी कैमरा लगा होता है …. !

जरा ध्यान से
एक लड़की अपने बॉय-फ्रेंड के साथ घूम रही थी.
बाप ने देख लिया तो लड़की को फोन किया.
बाप -”बेटी, कहाँ हो ?”
बेटी – “पेपर देने आई हूँ …. ”
बाप – बेटी, जरा ध्यान से पेपर देना …..इस पेपर का  रिजल्ट  आया तो जान ले लूँगा ….. !

 तुम पागल हो क्या
सन्ता सिंह अपनी पुरानी मारूति बेचना चाहता था जो 100000 कि.मी. से भी अधिक चल चुकी थी। चूंकि कोई उसे खरीदने को तैयार नहीं था वह अपने दोस्त के पास पहुंचा और उसे बेचने के लिए मदद मांगी।
दोस्त उसे सलाह दी कि वह कार के ‘स्पीडोमीटर’ की संख्या को 30000 के करीब कर दे ताकि वह अपने किसी ग्राहक को कह सके कि गाड़ी का इस्तेमाल बहुत कम हुआ है।
सन्ता सिंह को सुझाव पसन्द आया। कुछ हफ्ते बाद वही दोस्त उससे मिला और उसने जानना चाहा कि वह कार निकाल पाया या नहीं। सन्ता सिंह ने जवाब दिया “तुम पागल हो क्या। कौन अपनी कार बेचेगा जो केवल 30000 कि.मी. चली हो।”
  
ये कैसी बात है …
पत्नी (पति से) – एक बात कहूँ, नाराज़ तो नहीं होगे ?
पति – कहो क्या बात है ?
पत्नी - मैं माँ बनने वाली हूँ .
पति – इसमें नाराज़ होने वाली कौनसी बात है बल्कि ये तो खुशी की बात है.
पत्नी – दरअसल जब मैं कॉलेज में पढ़ती थी  तब यही बात मैंने पिताजी को बताई थी तो वे बहुत नाराज़ हुए थे ….. !
  
सिर्फ थैंक्स
लड़के ने लड़की को आइसक्रीम लाकर दी.
लड़की: थैंक्स.
लड़का: सिर्फ थैंक्स !
लड़की: तो तुम्हें किस चाहिए न ?
लड़का: बकवास मत कर, मुझे आधी आइसक्रीम चाहिए !

मतलब
लड़की ने अपने बॉय-फ्रेंड को फोन किया.
लड़की  :  मैं कल तुमसे मिलने नहीं आ सकती.
बॉय-फ्रेंड :  ओह ! चलो मैं तुम्हारा गिफ्ट किसी और को दे देता हूँ.
लड़की : मेरा मतलब था … मैं कल नहीं आ सकती ! अभी कहाँ हो तुम ???

अच्छा सा गिफ्ट
गर्ल (बॉय फ्रेंड  से) : कल मेरा बर्थडे है …  मुझे कोई अच्छा सा गिफ्ट देना .
बॉय फ्रेंड : क्या चाहिये ?
गर्ल :  रिंग !
बॉय फ्रेंड : ठीक है मै रिंग दूंगा लकिन please तुम pickup मत करना ..मोबाइल में बैलेंस कम है ….!!!


गलत हो गई 
संता ने अपनी गर्ल-फ्रेंड का नाम ब्लेड से अपने हाथ पर लिखा.
थोड़ी देर बाद वह जोर-जोर से रोने लगा.
बंता – “क्यों रो रहा है ?”
संता - “यार spelling  गलत हो गई !”

कितनी अच्छी बातें करते हो
 रेमिका : मेरे ओंठ गुलाब की पंखुड़ी जैसे हैं ना ?
प्रेमी : हाँ
प्रेमिका : मेरी आँखें कमल के फूल जैसी हैं ना ?
प्रेमी : हाँ
प्रेमिका : मेरी आवाज कोयल जैसी है ना ?
प्रेमी : हाँ
प्रेमिका : मेरी चाल मोरनी जैसी है ना ?
प्रेमी : हाँ

प्रेमिका : ओह ! तुम कितनी अच्छी बातें करते हो … !





 

A visit To Mumbai

Dear Friends,
This is some of photo collection when i had visited to Mumbai with my friends.

Rishi Rai my friend

Manish(Me)

Evening View , Mumbai

Gateway of India,Mumbai

Me(Manish),Rishi Rai at Mumbai

Me(Manish)

Fun Time with friends at Nandi Hills,Bangalore

Dear my Friends,
It was a nice trip to Nandi Hills with all of you my friends.We enjoyed a lot dear.I always miss you rishi,Vishank and Sidharth(Commando).

I am going to post some of picture.

Manish, Rishi and Vishank

Manish, Vishank and Rishi at Nandhi Hills on 4th sept 2011

Manish,Vishank and Rishi doing Jogging at Nandi Hills Bangalore on 4th sept. 2011

View of Nandi Hills

Some Memories and word for Love....

TUM CHAHE NA MUJHSE BAAT KARNA

TUM CHAHE NA MUJHSE BAAT KARNA,
MAGAR EK GUJARISH HAI TUMSE
SUNO SIRF EK BAAR MERA NAAM LEKAR,
KOI BHI ACHCHE SE KAPDE PEHANANA,
AUR PHIR HALKA HALKA SA SINGHAR KARNA,
MAIN TO NA TUMHE DEKH PAUNGA LEKIN,
SUNO SIRF EK BAAR MERA NAAM LEKAR,
AANKHON KO BAND KARNA,
DONO HAATHON MEIN CHHUPA KAR,
GHUMAAN KARNA KE MAIN TUMHE DEKH RAHA HOON,
FORAN AAINA DEKHNA,
EK TABDEELI HOGAYI TERE HUSN MEIN,
JAISE PHOOL SHABNAM SE THODA JHUK GAYA HO,
SUNO SIRF EK BAAR MERA NAAM LEKAR,
SEENE PE HAATH RAKHNA,
DHADKAN TO SAAF SUNAYI DEGI,
MAGAR USKI SHIKAAYAT KO BHI MEHSOOS KARNA.....

Real love

Ek Ladka marne ke baad Ladki ko bolta hai... 
Ek Wada the tera har wade ke piche,
Tu milegi mujhe har darwaje ke piche. Par main tujhse khafa hu kyonki,
ek tu hi nahin thi mere janaaze ke piche. 
Itne main saath wali kabr se ek lakdi ki awaaz aati hai... Ek wada the mera har wade ke piche,
mail milungi tujhe har darwaje ke piche, Par Tu ne hi mud kar naa dekha piche,
Ek aur janaaza tha tere janaaze ke piche

Dil se pyar khatm kyun nahi ho jata hai

dil se pyar khatm kyun nahi ho jata hai
chale jaane ke baad koi yaad itna kyun aata hai
har pal, har baat jinda hai dil me aaj bhi
ye dil inhe kahin door chor kyun nahi aata hai

jaan se bhi jyada chaha tha jise
vo aaj mujhe najar kyun nahi aata hai
bade pyar se sang dil me sapne sajaye they jisne
aaj dil use apne saath kyun nahi paata hai

jala de duniya sari ya phir jale de khud ko in yaadon ke saath hi
bas chah kar bhi dil itna hi kyun soch paata hai
har rah har raste me teri mahak aati hai
jise pakar jeena aur mushkil ho jaata hai

dil se pyar khatm kyun nahi ho jata hai
chale jaane ke baad koi yaad itna kyun aata hai
har pal, har baat jinda hai dil me aaj bhi
ye dil inhe kahin door chor kyun nahi aata hai

My memories and Best in My Life

My Memories

Dear friends the memories is vast and there are so amy things happens in every ones in life but there are something in life which can never be forgoteen at any momement .
I Remember some of the things in my life that i always use to remember from my child hood life are:-

• The First things that  i rememberd that my Grandfather(Dada Jee) has keep my hand and moving me near the Garden and there is some cow near by me and i was scared by seeing them.
• In my childhood when i was 4 or 5 year old i went to cinema hall to my mom and papa and as i enterd i started cried and within half hour all went out and i dont knw what happen bt my dady has thrown the bag of my mommmmmmmm
• Once in tajpur when my mom comes to meet her sister(my Mausi) then i dont know what happen to me but i started crying then i went to my mausi house with my mausi and not gone to my home.
• I think this is the incident of 92-93 when my mom got operation that time in my hospital everyone comes to see her that time my favrate bisuit was given by every one then one day in evening one lady has given two packate of buiscuit then my papa then taken 4rm me,then i cried for two daysss.

The Best in My life

Dear friends You Know Once the moment goes from your life never comes back,when i remembering back i really goes into deep silence because the moment i had vested with my childhood friends is very memories.
The best part of my life is the school life at St. Paul school.i will never forget any part of that.on that time i had met some of the friends that never be forgotten and i dont know where is he or she but she is always remembered by me and think all will be remembering that moment very happily.
In School initially i was very week student but there are somebody who has make me feel that i can do something.i also remembering the teacher of math sir(M.Srin sir) for the initial period of helping in 4th class.I also rembering P.B.SHARKAR Sir and Mandal sir and s.p.singh(principal sir) they all help me a lot and treat me like a child in my hostel life.I was too much naughty student and always forward in all activity like mar-pit,ladai etc.exept the reading later i also started reading well...
The beuty of life is the hostel life that i had seen  and enjoyed a lot inspite of that there are some best and sad memories that can't be publicized so
For best part of your life is always live for today and dont think of past what had gone and don't aspects for present that what might you will get.....

Dear Friend the one thing i wanted to share with you that i had met with friend who is so caring and loving to them and i wanted them to be with me for forever...

About Me and My Family

ABOUT ME........

Name:-Manish Kumar
Father's Name:-Ram Bilas singh
Mother's-M.devi
Home Town :-samastipur,Patna
State-Bihar
Country-INDIA
D.O.B:-10-12-1987

My First Education............

First School:-In my Village
Primary Education:-St.paul senior secondary  school,Birshinghpur,samastipur,Bihar,INDIA(C.B.S.E)
 Secondary Education :-S.M.INTER COLLEGE,HAJIPUR,VAISALI,BIHAR
Gratuation:-IGNOU,New delhi
Post Gratuation:-Doing MBA From MSRIM,Banglore
Specialization:-HR and Marketing


MY Lovely Family

I am only brother and i have three sisters .i am the second one .the elder is my sister whose name is ARCHANA KUMARI my mom use to call them GURIYA because she was so beautiful in there child hood so all started to say her GURIAYA.
I am the second one in my family my name is Manish Kumar but in child hood my dadi use to call me SITARAM because she wants to remind GOD Every Times.She used to Love Me very much that i am realizing now, but in child days i was thinking that if there is any enemy of mine that is my DADI
Third is my younger sister RANJANA KUMARI ,she use very quite naughty and so smart.
the last sister name is SABNAM KUMARI she is very smart and also very naughty and at least i cant dare to go with her anywhere
My Mom is a social person and in-spite of having so many problems she use to serve all of us into very efficient manner
My papa uses to love my younger sister very much ,he even not prefer me or anyone for anything but he call her and give all the gifts and choco to her only.He also Loves all of my brothers and sisters also.
No my Younger sister got married in may 2011 and went own home and my mom and papa always miss her.
I always miss my loving and caring family...